I Hate Public Speaking: What to do with your hands*

*read the whole newsletter and subscribe for the answer!

Only joking.

I'll give you the answer right now. (Here's the link to contact me to book a free taster session, if you're too busy to find the one at the end.

There's no right or wrong answer.

*sits back with a look of smug satisfaction trying to pass itself off as wisdom*

There is no right or wrong spoon... this is wisdom

When you're struggling with something like public speaking, presenting, giving a big speech, you go looking for advice and find people like me online saying the most annoying six words in the English language: 'There's no right or wrong answer'.

'BUT I WANT ANSWERS!'

I hear myself shouting this in my head when I hear this sentence (and I’m looking for a quick simple solution).

Don't worry though: the internet is full of answers about what to do with your hands:

(I love the bit when, after over a minute of telling us what to do with our hands he says 'there's no right way to do this' and then spends another two minutes telling us the right way to use our hands)

Or try this:

Here you go - some right answers! A whole list of very specific instructions about what to do - and not do - with your hands. Also useful for social situations! Because nothing says 'confident' at a party or on a first date like someone who's trying to remember what they practised doing with their hands.

If you like the above, and you’re not busy for the next three weeks, the same outfit Science of People has a list of  60 Hand Gestures You Should Be Using (and their Meaning).

There's only 60! Clear your diary, this is gonna be a big job…

Ok. Enough linking to other people's dodgy videos.
If you just want to be told what to do with your hands, plus a dollop of pseudoscience to explain the behavioural psychology behind every head-scratch or ear-touch, go for it. A whole internet full of clickbait awaits.

It's not that I think hand gestures don't matter.

On the contrary - in most cases, with most speakers, they're essential.

It's just not as simple as 'do this do that'.

When it comes to being a better speaker, I am constantly emphasising that speaking is a physical act.

Your mouth is not the only part of your body involved in expressing your thoughts through speaking.

Speaking should involve your entire body. Whether you're in the room, on Zoom, or on the phone.

I've written about this before, in reference to things like Prime Minister Keir Starmer's speaking style, and whether he's had coaching to release physical tension and speak with less of the nasal twang he used to be famous for.

Now, I'm not a classical voice coach by training, and I won't get you singing scales or throwing sofa cushions in the air or giving you a spinal massage (that costs extra haha).

 But I do almost always find that we need to get you more physical involved in the act of speaking.

And the good news is: we always start with what you have to say - and you are already the expert in that.

Then we look at how your hands, and your face, and the rest of your body, can support and really deliver what you're communicating using words.

This is why I'm so sceptical about '60 ways to use your hands and what they mean'.

Your body should not be speaking one language while your mouth is speaking another.

Presenting on a new marketing campaign or investment strategy, while trying to remember 'is it palms-up for empathy and palms-down for confidence or the other way around?' is not going to make you feel relaxed and in control.

Book a free taster session with me, and we'll go into all this in more depth. It's worth exploring in more depth, isn't it. There's more going on here than you can sort out in five minutes of Googling.

Then during a one-to-one course, we'll find a way of using your hands and body that works for you, feels right, and makes the job of listening to you feel super-easy. 

And of course, there are some cheap tips and tricks, but I'll save them for some future clickbait videos :)

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